A day in the Twilight Zone

Silver enjoyed a ten minute intensive cuddling session last night, just before I went to bed – and went outside right afterwards. She didn’t come back nor have I seen her this morning. So I had a bit of a restless night – and woke up this morning from a very weird dream: I dreamt I was sitting at a rock beach, watching the waves roll in when I noticed a bird being washed onto the rocks. I went to investigate and it was a barely alive dove. I picked it up, stroked its chest, which brought up some water, then carried it to safety. As I sat with it on my lap, it was suddenly a cat! A black and white cat, like the one I’ve seen at my food bowl outside. I was contemplating a permanent home for the cat when the alarm woke me up.

On the way to work I managed to take a wrong turn! There are road-works right at the turn onto the highway and somehow I missed that little gap where I should have turned. So I ended up driving straight through Despatch! This route is shorter – but as the speed limit through town is only 60 km/h, whereas the highway it’s 120 km/h – shorter isn’t faster.

At work, there was no space for me to park my car – some trucks had already blocked the cars parked in front of the fire station, so I ended up driving around and parking in a bit of a precarious spot, under a lifted road barrier.

And then I realised that I had forgotten my belt! So our electrician helped with an on-site solution: Velcro strip! He has a roll of Velcro, and measured around my waist, so now I’ve threaded that through the belt loops and my jeans are held up by Velcro!

On my desk I find a box. It looks like a pastry box, and has a label from Patisserie & Bakery The Pastryworks. No clue whether that’s meant for me, or someone forgot it on my desk. My PC is the site PC – and often people need to get data off it onto a USB or print something from here, so it’s not unusual that someone else sits here before I get in or after I leave. Sometimes I’m even asked to take a break, so someone can use the PC.

I go out, I come back to find a piece of pastry unpacked onto a plate on my desk. That’s no longer a subtle hint, but an smack on the back of the head! In German there’s a saying “Wink mit dem Zaunpfahl” – I can’t think of an English equivalent right now.

Lunch was again sponsored by our electrician, who made us some of the burgers left over from Saturday. With that super-sweet piece of pastry plus the burger – I am full! If only I could take a nap now – as they say in Afrikaans “Maagie vol, oogies toe” approximately “stomach full, eyes shut” though with cute diminutives.

I’ve done my due diligence with all the open subjects, so this afternoon I had better continue with the documentation I’m to print and hang up around the whole plant (aka the deadlined task).

Aaaand that didn’t work out as planned – again! I’ve had to chase after a shipment floating nearby en route to nobody-knows-who-should-receive-it. With no clue who will be managing delivery. Then a salvo of orders went out, where I’ll be expected to track delivery and ensure a purchase order covers them and now it’s nearly time to go home. I managed to print one measly little document so far!

Oh joy! Just the perfect touch to this twilight zone day: Estate Agent calls, wants to schedule her six-monthly inspection! Er, what? First legal inspection since I moved in over a year ago and you really call it a six-monthly inspection? She wants to know what time Saturday will suit me. Someone give me strength! Shall I swallow a bottle of sleeping pill just before she arrives so I don’t loose my temper at any time and accidentally strangle her? I can already imagine her chirpy comments – how on earth will I manage to keep the sarcasm at bay? On the one hand, I might finally be able to get my spare key back – but on the other hand: what if they actually try to instigate repairs? Leaving my home wide open to anyone for a whole day, again? Argh! What hell awaits me? I will need to call her back with a time for Saturday – better make it eleven; at least by then I’m sure to be back from the dreaded shopping. Only to face a dread worse than shopping! I had better prepare myself mentally as much as possible, like come up with a calming mantra to focus on. Something silly like “She, too, shall piss off”. Hopefully I can come up with something better.

Oh, and I better de-smoke the lounge! Shall I make some pickled onions? He He He! That should do the trick! My neighbour suggested putting down a saucer of vinegar the night before – yet “half measures availed us nothing”.

Silver is turning out to be quite a character! I made myself steamed potatoes for dinner. As always, when I set foot in the kitchen her survivor-predatory instinct comes awake and she meows most pitifully – and continuously! Thinking it safe, I let her smell the potatoes. Yep, turned up her nose and walked away. Then, when I was nearly finished, she started her demanding-food routine again, so I let her up on my lap … and would you believe it? Now she suddenly likes potatoes! When I put the one’s she’d licked in her bowl – she actually ate them! And I had only added some garlic butter! Who’d have thought?!?