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Tuesday, 30 October 2018

Day 5 of 100, Sunday, 28th October


Another bad night followed by yet another early morning. I’m starting to seriously feel tense and stressed. With all the physical side-effects my body creates … the back injuries from past car accidents are giving me tension headaches, and my colon is going into overdrive – especially since I’m not really eating much; and what I eat is not really helpful.

If only I could sleep! I’ve tried meditating, I’ve tried kittie-cuddling, I’ve tried avoiding stimulants (i.e. less coffee! but unfortunately, I’m smoking more …). I get to sleep okay, but wake up soon afterwards! And not the ‘mind-half-asleep stumble to the bathroom’ wake-up, but instant wide-awake, mind at full speed going off on tangents! And then I struggle again to go to sleep. I’m physically exhausted, low on energy, but as tense as … well, something that’s very tense.

This can’t go on, if I don’t find a way to break this cycle, I will get sick – and I can’t afford to! Time! There just isn’t enough time! And with every day that goes by, the pressure rises – and, although I’ve got things done, it’s not enough. It feels like I’m running in circles, going nowhere fast! I feel guilty every time I sit down, every minute I’m not packing, every minute I ‘waste’ on non-move-related tasks – including the unavoidable household chores, like dishes, cooking, eating.

That’s my Adult Child characteristics! I’m guessing at what normal people would do in my situation, but I have no real basis for deciding what normal really is. Adult Children also have difficulty following a project through from beginning to end – and I’m now faced with a project I MUST follow through to the end. That scares the bejeebers out of me! Adult children judge themselves without mercy – well, I’m not perfect, normal people are perfect … and I’m not meeting my own insane expectations … only, I have forgotten that my expectations are insane. Adult Children alo overreact to changes over which they have no control … that pretty much sums up the past 5 days, doesn’t it?

So. Time to admit that I’m powerless and my attempts to control the uncontrollable are not only driving me insane, but making my life unmanageable. Back to the program, remember what you learned? I don’t have to manage my life, that’s not my job! Hand over the control-freak, let go … and trust that absolutely nothing will happen to me, that together, with a power greater than myself, I can not handle! I have 13 years experience and memories to draw on – it’s no longer a matter of ‘blind faith’ or unfounded trust. Every time I ‘let go and let God’, the perfect solution popped into my head! All I have to do is open the communication-line – clear my head of all the junk; then take it one step at a time, one day at a time.

Right. Now I’m beginning to grasp that handing over my tasks in the fellowships is NOT something I should feel guilty about. I’ve put a lot of time and effort into building a community, rather than whipping players to meet targets – even though it is indeed ‘just a game’, there are real people behind the Avatars. They deserve the ability to continue – and not to be just dropped. It’s bad enough when fellows do that – just quit playing without a word. But I’ve taken on leadership of two fellowships – and if I just quit, I’m dropping some 30-40 people! People I’ve come to know and care for – and who, in turn, also care about me!

So. I also have a volunteer plus back-up for the newcomer fellowship. To carry on helping new players find their feet and grow – then join the big fellowship. Both have joined the Rising Stars Fellowship, but only recently. They haven’t had the chance to get to know the fellowship – so on Sunday, I wrote extensive bios on each of the players. What I know about them, and especially what I’ve discussed with each of the older ones with respect to a) the spreadsheet feature and b) moving to the big fellowship.

With that done, my mind is beginning to calm a little and I turn my attention back to the whole move thing.

My biggest concerns are: 1) how to transport the cats, 2) time! Two months is simply not enough time! 3) Year End is the worst possible time to not just travel but also, there are business’ I’ll need – maybe labour? Carpet cleaners. And what if something unexpected comes up – I’ll have no options to make a plan!

I’ve decided to call my boss and ask him to postpone – hopefully till end of February, but at least to the end of January! He’s a great problem solver, so he will ask why – and he will suggest solutions to anything; and remain firm on the date. BUT: The end of year shutdown … he’s also realistic and he know that, no matter how good you plan, things can go wrong and you will need to make a plan. Having no options available, really can’t be solved. Also, he does care about my well-being … and I haven’t been able to sleep since he told me. He is definitely not unreasonable, just very, very good at being firm. And I’m not a good negotiator.

What’s the best time to call him? Well, first, I need to have solid points firmly in my mind, so I don’t babble. Although I know he doesn’t mind, I don’t like to call him on weekends. So, I will call on Monday.

Right. Next. Cats. I start looking online, the first sites that pop up are airline sites – with practically all the same guidelines; and the standard requirements set by the SPCA. I look at the cost of flying them … and it’s about the same as flying myself. That is, all three cats will cost about the same as one ticket for a person. BUT: I will have to take Ziva for her booster shots – she’s due in December. Mewthos and Lady Jane are due in January, but they may insist that they get their shots before they fly, like they should be ‘immune’ for at least some time. Like you can’t travel on a passport that’ll expire on the date you plan to return, they expect it to be valid at least 6 weeks or 3 months past the date. I hadn’t planned on boosting their vaccinations – it’s so expensive! And I never took Mynx for annual booster shots, nor has Rose taken any of hers, ever!

I decide to start by asking our vet! I write down some questions, so I don’t forget – and list what I want to buy (1x 4kg food, some sachets and as many catnip shakers as they have!).

Our gardener will work for me on Monday. I’ll have to tell him the bad news: That this is his last day working for me. I hate to deprive him of his income – especially so shortly before Christmas! But I really can’t afford to waste any money, now – I will need every penny I can hold on to!

Right. Next. I do need some groceries, even though I’m not really eating! I’ve started clearing out what’s in the freezer – I’ve taken out the Leberkäse for tonight. I decide to go to Makro, get a fair stock of packing tape and I’ll have to go soon, anyway, as I’m running out of cigarettes. I start writing a list of what I’ll need … and then I think “Why not stock up? Save yourself the time of going again next month?” Well, I can’t really afford to do 2 months stock on one month’s salary, so I decide to stock up gradually … get 1 ½ months now, and another 1 ½ month after pay-day; that will save my having to go during the Christmas madness.

When I finished the list, I re-write it in the order I’ll encounter items in the store. I also decide to look at prices for a new Induction cooker plate – since mine is starting to act up.

After Makro, I’ll come back via Sunridge Spar and get some fresh groceries, like pasta salads, fruit & veg, meat.

Right. It’s a plan. One day at a time. Off to bed, and hope I can sleep, for a change.

As I’m leaning over the oven, to switch off the kitchen light, I feel the heat – and remember: I had put the Leberkäse in the oven for dinner … hours ago! Oh gosh! Well, I forgot to have dinner, yet again. I switch off the oven, the light and go to bed.

Tossing and turning. Sit up and meditate. Tossing and turning. Cuddle kitties. Tossing and turning … then … sleep.

Awake! What time is it? Oh dang, 2 in the morning. Why am I wide awake, again? Try to get back to sleep …

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